Week 29: Rest In Peace

As the school bell rang for me to teach class again, a week ago Thursday, the shocking news came via email: Amelia Fuka past away. After a gasp that turned every head in the room, immediately tears steamed down my cheeks. Standing outside my classroom speechless and blotting the endless flow of tears, I tried to regain composure; my students caught my state of disarray while peeking through the cracked door. There wasn’t enough time to grieve properly, and since Thursday I’ve felt confused and deeply saddened by the recent losses the Fuka family has faced.

Monday my best upper level student wrote me. As soon as the letter was opened, all the feelings immensified: pity, grief, sadness, confusion, and so forth. He told me his good friend, Kim Kyung Min, who is 16 years old just like himself, committed suicide. He wrote me asking what to do. He said he was confused and scared, couldn’t believe it until he went to the funeral. How could this have happened? He turned to me for answers.

I don’t think I can say the right thing to make it “all better,” ’cause it wont bring back that person. The only thing I can provide is what God has given and taught me: compassion and prayer. These I offered my agnostic student. For a week now I’ve been trying to think of things to say to the the Fuka family, especially Pastor Alex Fuka, Amelia’s husband and the Pastor who baptized me SDA, and Rene, their daughter: there’s nothing I can do but only lean on God. The only and best thing I can say of comfort are the words that God has taught me through His prayers and love.

Today is Thanksgiving. For one week now I’ve attempted to write Amelia Fuka’s dedication…the grief overpowers my words. Amelia Fuka is one of the most Christ-like examples of love and compassion. Upon her initial request, I happily called her ‘mom’ sometimes. Her sweet smile and Bible teachings she inadvertently taught me through her actions are etched in my mind. She invited me over for many sleepovers during the Sabbath, and we enjoyed our long conversations be the long drive from my house to hers or our rare but special phone conversations. Amelia always had “a good boy for me,” too.  I love Amelia Fuka very much. Last Thursday night and since, my nights are spend in prayers of Thanksgiving:

Thank you, Lord, for the opportunity I had to meet Amelia Fuka.

Thank you, Lord, for having such a great Christian roll model to look up to and have in the church family.

Thank you, Lord, for Amelia Fuka and all the lives she’s touch.

Thank you, Lord, for this time Amelia Fuka can sleep, can rest in peace until we all meet Jesus together at once during His second coming.

Right now is very difficult because the woman, the mother, the wife, the caretaker, the auntie, the Christian we all love and adore is no longer with us in this life on Earth. It’s hard to believe still; I keep thinking when I eventually return to the United States I’m going to call her and she’ll pick me up and we’ll have another Sabbath sleepover while she introduces me to her second, latest grandchild. Amelia Fuka, I love you so much. I pray for the Fuka family and the countless lives Amelia has touched will find some comfort under His wing and the promise of Eternity, where there will be no more tears and we will meet again. This, in Jesus name, I pray.

-Phoebe Hoa Keever

Thanksgiving, November 27th 2008

Week 28: Work Place Update

“Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” In attempts to comply with this classic expression but also maintain my Christianity to “love your enemies,” this blog will simply lay out the facts. In other words, Imma bite my tongue and try to refrain from my interjections every other sentence.

First, read Week 27 blogs to get an idea of where I stood a month ago. Finished? Good. Now that you have a foundation of about where I stood a month ago, we can continue with that in mind. Christine, the boss, had a baby mid September so left on maternity leave at the beginning of September. She was to come back mid October, a month after having her baby. Long story short: didn’t happen. In fact, mid-October her son missed a whole week of school “sick” while at the same time the cook, who is the son’s grandma and the boss’ mom, started showing up for “tea time” while the other cooked worked her butt off in the kitchen busting out breakfast and lunch for the whole kindergarten school. The next week, tea time ended and the son’s chair was removed from class and cubby hole vacated; Grandma the cook, Christine the boss, and her son the student all left the school. Rumor had it she wasn’t coming back.

The next week was a great week, a week that gave hope for a better tomorrow.  Monday the head foreign teacher, Teddy, did not show up. Him being a no-show was not uncommon so we figured he was at home with his hangover again. Tuesday he didn’t show up either. His classes had no teacher. Not even a text he was taking a sick day. No one could get ahold of him. Essentially, he quit without notice. Rumor had it that he left and joined Christine to their new job scandal. May God be with their coworkers. From this end, it was a huge blessing and answer to prayer (of course, in His unexpected, unpredictable awesome ways) to be in a more honest workplace environment. By the end of the week, he was officially fired by the head office.

Sunday, November 2nd was field day with every student and their family. Christine showed up to “show face,” or “save face.” Naturally, none of the parents talked to her. When she spoke to the foreign teachers it was interesting to listen to her lie right in our faces with a sweet, soft smile. Disgusting, really. Those are the kinds we need to pray for, though; that they realize the good in telling the truth. Obviously, lying doesn’t get you too far. Two head staff that lied got in trouble and now don’t work at our branch. The cook’s scandal of getting paid as a teacher in her contract was maybe found out, maybe not. Either way, she now is not employed with KJC.

However, this week we lost a whole Kindergarten class because the parents where uncomfortable with “not having a boss in charge.” Plus, their kids missed the head foreign teacher who was known by the parents as fun…he lifted the kids and did many magic tricks. Neither kids nor their parents knew the truth about him coming to teach their children with hangovers, not showing up to work, etc. Of course not, Korean culture seems to put a front on things…keeps things pretty. Don’t spill the beans, don’t make a mess.  Besides loosing Schweitzer class, other students here and there are dropping like flies, slowly but surely.

December Hwamyeong-dong Kookje (KJC) gets a new boss. We haven’t yet met her. I tried not to interject my narratives but it was hard to do–my bad. Let’s just hope this new upcoming boss is honest. It makes the 9-5 (or in my case 9-6:35) more bearable, even enjoyable.

Week 27: Halfway Point!

They say you can tell if you’re optimist or pessimist by how you view the cup: half empty or half full. However, what is it considered when I’m HALFWAY DONE, and that ROCKS!? Water under the bridge, baby. Guess I just invalidated the cup theory.

The past 6 months have been difficult. Definite ups and downs. Now, if I’m gonna be honest with you, though, I gotta tell it to you straight: there were much more downs. Every week–no, every other week just to sound a tad bit more positive–I made an escape plan. I’d stomp home huffing and puffing from yet another disastrous miscommunication. Frequently, I found myself in culturally stressful situations, meaning even my excessive body language didn’t help alleviate the communication process, and nothing was solved.

It was about a month ago when I was really at wits end. Despite me wanting to keep my loyalties to the contract and stick out a year, I was having trouble finding the needle in the haystack. In other words, there were 3 things I liked in Korea: my own sic apartment, the lovely of lovelies Newton students, and church family. Anything else just seemed to upset me. When someone is at a point where everything pisses them off, it’s time for a change. Searching out different options and talking with various loved ones, I realized that change needed to come from my own heart. Changing locations is a tactic of running away from the problems at hand. Nevertheless, problems will always catch up to you regardless of location. A friend who loves giving wisdom said, “it’s better to make the wrong choice at 110% then the right choice at 50%.” That really stuck. After reviewing my options, including serendipitously coming across 2nd Corinthians 8:9-11,”what you began-now finish doing it.” I deliberately made the choice to remain in Korea the remainder of my contract.

Not factoring in the long, cold winter that lies ahead, the next 6 months will be a breeze. I’ve adjusted and am secure and content where I am. In fact, there are now 7 points on my list of “Things I Love In Korea” (I’m aiming for 10 points…It’ll happen). Point 7 of “10 things I am thankful for in Kora” is: The many adversities in Korea, because “adversity spurs growth” (my quote 🙂

Week 26: Kinder Halloween

Korea as a whole doesn’t celebrate Halloween as a national holiday. The only ones getting dressed up in costume are foreigners and international schools such as Kookje, or KJC, where I work.

My studetns look as cute as ever. The flix speak for themselves:

 Elementary Academy Halloween Festival. Me the maid and Kelly the cat.

 Youngest kinders-4yrs

  maid me, pumpkin kitty, giraffe emily (newtons)

 Grace admin and Andre Co-foreign teacher

 Rachel and Andre’s Einstien class–personally, I dig Oliver’s Santa suit.

 Darwin’s (5yrs) with Sunny teacher.

Most of the Kinder Staff in Halloween Costume! Oct 2008 Busan, South Korea