Week 23: Intensely Hitting The 5 Month Mark

Why is five month more important than 4,3,2 or 1 months? For starters, I have never lived anywhere overseas longer than 5 months.

• High school summer exchange program, Costa Rica: 2 months
• Jr. college year abroad, fall semester, Uruguay: 5 months
• Mission trip during summer vacation, Peru: 2 months
• Jr. colege year abroad, spring semester, Argentina: 5 months
• After college/before Korea, I-know-it’s-not-a different-country-from-the -USA-but-it-might-as-well-should-be, Hawaii: 5 months
• Full time English teacher, since May 2008, South Korea: now 5 months.

In South America, as much as I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEE(D) Uruguay and Argentina, by the end of my stay I was itching to leave. Same goes for Hawai’i; I didn’t care how much the sun, surf, and sand filled that rock I needed to LEAVE wayyyyyyyyy before I did. Now, I’ve survived 5. whole. months. Trust me, I contemplate leaving my job and this country on a very regular basis, more times than I care to admit. Nevertheless, since I have pinpointed this habit, I see it as a weakness, as a desire to keep running. For those of you who have met me in person, even briefly, it’s not hard to figure out I constantly challenge myself–at least regarding my psyche.

This past week has been INTENSE. Exhausted, stressed, and confused, I finally turned to God for the answer. What does He want of me? What is His will? How will He manifest himself thru me? I spend the Sabbath in amazing prayer, song, and meditation. How God manifested himself is simply humbling and AMAZING. Once I let God ‘in,’ and not just saying it but living it, He doesn’t hesitate in keeping his end of the relationship. The Bible is not dead–it is LIVING and Breathing. You can’t convince me, either, that everything I prayed about only to open up my Bible to the page and see the same words I was using or clear answer is a coincidence. Coincidences happen once in a while…not constantly, right? Anyways, to make my loooooooong stories short, I’ve been in Korea over 5 months now and it’s no surprise to anyone who has seen me in Korea that I am tired, worn out, and overworked. The conclusion to this weekend of intense time spent in His name and talking with my loved friends and family was to call my boss Sunday night with a proposal for a re-negotiation of my contract. I will find out by the end of the week if my offer of one class less per day (for a total of 9 classes–still a lot, but manageable) is approved. Of course it will come with a pay cut, but in the end, what is more important: my health, happiness, and sanity, or an extra G? Besides, I’d end up using that extra cash to pay for doctor’s visits, counseling sessions, and anger management classes by years end if I continue in Korea the way I have been the past 5 months.

Although I could potentially dip out, I’m seeing where God is going with this one. This past weekend I’ve had a great Sabbath and rekindling with my Lord, so… Although living here presents many challenges which I will spare you the details of my soapbox rant, I intend to push past this fifth month and onto the HALFWAY POINT: 6 months. and who knows….I mean God can move mountains…so I don’t doubt his ability to change my perspectives…I could end up not wanting to leave Korea! Well, let’s not jump ahead of ourselves now lolz but ya know…;) much love.

My desk

The teacher’s office–20 teachers in one room with kids running in and out.